Remembering the Animals of War

Anyone who knows me, knows I am abhorrently opposed to war on any scale, for any reason.
It's not something I am even prepared to concede on given "circumstances".
War is a life consuming black hole that sucks away the joy and happiness from the lives of innocent people. It causes death and destruction on a needlessly horrific scale, and leaves little room for hope and freedom.
Unfortunately, governments usually see it necessary to not just involve innocent people in their conflicts, but even-more-innocent animals too.

The misery that loyal and gentle creatures are subjected to in the name of war is sickening.

Today is Remembrance Sunday here in the UK, where we are supposed to remember those who have fallen for our country, and our freedoms. I won't deny that the men and women who are brave enough to engage in our country's battles don't deserve the highest honours, but that choice should never be available to begin with. Nobody should be subjected to the horrors of war, and we should remember those who have fallen.
Having said that, going back to my first point about animals, I think it's important to remember that ultimately, men and women do have choices. Animals do not.

In London, UK, there is a large memorial near Hyde Park that is dedicated to the poor animals who have died and suffered for the sake of human conflict. A choice they did not have.







Dan.

Updates etc

Hello everyone!

I am really sorry for not updating this page in a while!
Jon was over for a visit for two weeks, and we travelled about a lot. Then I just got busy with work, and other things, too.

Anyway, I am still here. We are still of course waiting for the next part of our immigration process to happen, and when it does, you will all most certainly know about it!

I had to apply for a new passport last week. If anyone in the UK needs to renew, now would be a very good time... I sent my passport application using the Post Office's 'check and send' service last Monday, at about 3.30pm (it was right after work).
The guy went through my application, bagged it up, I paid the money and off it went that night.
Friday morning at 10.25am the doorbell rang, and a special courier handed me my new passport!
I was floored. I wouldn't have been more shocked! Less than four days for a new passport has to be a world record for sure!

So anyway, I now have my shiny new British passport, ready to have my shiny new US visa stuck into it... eventually! Let's hope that is sooner rather than later.

I think that's all for now.

Happy Halloween everyone!

Dan.

Battle of the Taxes

Hello everyone,

Today I wanted to take a look at the taxes of both the United States and the United Kingdom, and compare them to each other, and see who ends up being "better off", if any at all.
I'll just put my thoughts, some might be biased, some not. I'll let you be the overall judge, although I have set out some criteria below.
Please, please let me know your own thoughts in the comments at the end. I'd love to get everyones perspectives on all this.
Obviously talking about taxes is not the most fun subject in the world, but if you're genuinely interested in finding out about standards and costs of living between different places, it makes for interesting discussion.
I know that there isn't nearly enough good discussion on these kinds of things for newbie immigrants like myself, and it is something that seems daunting when you move to a new place. So I write this all with the hope that I can at least assist someone out there, even if just one question is answered by all this, it has been worth it.

Rules and Criteria For My Arguments
I'm not a business person, or qualified in accountancy of any kind, but I have done my research, and where possible, I will back up all my points with evidence. I won't just put something out there and make assumptions. I'll make it as factually accurate as I can.
I am going to write this from my point of view, as a fully capable, young adult who currently works in the UK. I think this will offer a fair comparison to most adults who have a regular job and income.
Obviously everyone's personal circumstances are slightly different, but we'll just go with the fact that I am a regular working adult.

Direct Taxes
Let's start with what I will refer to as a direct tax. Like I said, I'm no accountant, so if that's not a "technical term", then so be it, but that's what I'm calling this first category.

Direct taxes are taxes which are paid regularly, directly to the government. They immediately affect us as they are immediately deducted by whatever means, or are required to be paid immediately when billed.

Income Tax in the UK
Of course income tax on earnings is the biggest direct tax of all, and the one that affects nearly everybody who has ever worked.
Income tax rates in the UK are high generally, but more for higher income earners, and can go from 20%, all the way up to 45%.
For a regular working adult like myself, the current income tax rate in the UK is set at 20% on all earnings over £9440. This means that I can earn £9440 and not pay tax, anything over this amount is taxed at 20% (on just the excess amount, it does not work retroactively to tax all my income).
For anyone who is employed in the UK, taxes are worked out and deducted automatically from your salary/payslip/pay check. Nobody ever has to file a tax return if you're employed.
It's that simple. (We won't go down the route of self-employed, as that's not the point of this right now.)

If underpayments are required, HM Revenue and Customs normally send a letter informing you of how much is owed, and what options you have to pay the underpayment back. Usually you will be offered to be able to pay it back as part of your next tax year in your salary (your tax code will change and you will pay slightly more for however long it takes to make the repayment).
If overpayments are made, HM Revenue and Customs will automatically send you a cheque.
It should be noted that these instances do not happen often. If you change jobs and your new tax code isn't entered correctly by your employer then it may alter something, but that is unlikely.
If you are married or in a Civil Partnership, there is Married Couples Allowance. The rules of which seem complicated to me, but again, this is usually worked out automatically. It basically come down to that you should be paying slightly less tax in your salary, because you're married/CP'd.

It should be noted also that if you're retired, on a low income, disabled, and a multitude of other scenarios, the same applies. Your circumstances are all automatically calculated by the HMRC, and you shouldn't have to file anything. You might get a letter from time to time asking to prove your circumstances are still the same (for example, if you're on a low income, single parent etc), but that's about it.

In summary, if you work, and have a regular salary, or are retired or receive a permanent benefit (disabled etc), you'll be taxed in your salary/benefit, and never have to worry about filing anything else. Ever.

Federal Income Tax in the US
In the US, from my understanding, income tax is much more complicated.
For a start, everybody pays tax, regardless of income level. When I looked at the Federal Income Tax rates it seems that you have to pay a different percentage of tax for each level of income you earn.
For example, a single person who earns $25000 would pay 10% tax on anything from $0 to $8925, then 15% on anything else up to the $25000.
The tax rates also vary if you are filing as a single person, married filing together, married filing separately, or even as a household if you have dependants.
I also understand that a basic amount of tax is taken from salaries, but American still have to file anyway, for anything that is missed by the salary deduction and any adjustments that the IRS do not know about (income from other sources, bonuses, savings, etc).
If you owe anything, then you have to pay it with your returns, or if anything is owed, you can claim it back.
But of course, it isn't that simple in reality. As I mentioned, you could have some sort of adjustment, which could be in the form of an allowance/deduction, that means that you pay no tax on the first X-amount, for example $5000, and then 10% on $5000 to 13925 ($8925+$5000). There are a whole manner of scenarios as to why this can happen, such having children, medical expenses, interest payments on your home... The list goes on, and can get very complicated.
Jon admittedly did try to explain it all to me more accurately, and I tried to cover it the best I could here, but to explain it all would simply not be possible!

This is of course just for Federal Income Tax.
Then we come to State Income Tax.

State Income Tax in the US
You have filed your Federal Income Taxes, and you're done, right? Wrong. You also have to pay state taxes!
State income taxes can be mind-bogglingly complicated. I googled to see what I could find out about Maryland taxes, as that's where Jon and I will be living together, and I have to say, I was really lost.
You might think I'm trying to add a biased spin to this, but I'm really not. I wanted to make it sound simple, but all I came up against was long, complicated webpages, online leaflets and pages of numbers and percentages.
Eventually I found a site that listed them all by state. Seven states pay none, remarkably.
And from what I could make out, seven pay a flat rate, regardless of income. The rest, plus DC, pay a variable rate depending on income.
As with Federal Income Taxes, what you pay can depend on varying circumstances, from dependants, other sources of income etc.

Based on my example earlier of someone who earns $25000, in addition to the Federal taxes of up to 15%, that person would also have to pay 4.75% on earnings over $3000, plus an extra $90 (don't even ask!), PLUS county taxes, of at least 1.25% (based on the "cheapest" county to live in)!
So to live in the "cheapest" county in Maryland, your income taxes all combined (including Federal) at looking to be at least 21% - for a low income worker!
That's already 1% more than the UK. I realise that for Federal taxes the amount is staggered, but still, 21% is a lot, and the threshold is a lot less than the £9440 tax free allowance of the UK.
Also, of course, I know there are deductions that might bring your taxes down (dependants etc), but I'm trying to keep this simple - which as you can see is a challenge in itself!

Living Outside the US
Of course, if you're a US Citizen and you live outside the US, you don't escape the tax system that easily!
If you are a US Citizen, you are still required to file taxes in the US, even if you don't owe anything!
And get this, if the equivalent of any income tax you pay in your country of residence is less than the US rate, then you have to pay the US the difference! Even if you are not living or working in the US, and haven't done for several years, you are still basically penalised and taxed on your hard earned cash!
To my knowledge, no other country makes their citizens do this.

Summary
All I can say is, what a nightmare! I hope that all made sense, and if not - then you can hopefully see how confused I have been by it all!
It isn't just the percentages and numbers that cause me issue though; it's the fact that you have to go through all of this in the first place.
It seems like one big hassle to sit and work all these figures out for yourself, buy specialised software to do the calculations, and even in some cases hire a lawyer - just to pay taxes!
The US government do not make things easy!

Filing my own taxes (albeit with Jon of course) is the one thing that I think I am going to find really strange and annoying about moving to the US. I realise Jon has had a lot of experience with this, but it's not something I have ever had to deal with, and it's a little daunting.

I can't guarantee that either system is better or more affordable than another, but having been with Jon for nearly 6 years, and having lived in the UK all my life, I personally have to go with the UK system.
Some might say that I'm being biased, but why would I want the hassle of such a system, like the US?
It just seems like one big headache!

I said I'd back up my evidence, and so at the end of this blog post, I have listed all the websites I used as a point of reference.

Please do let me know your thoughts, in the comments below.

In my next article I'll be talking about the NHS, Health Insurance, Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid.

Dan.

*

References:

HM Revenue and Customs - http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/incometax/personal-allow.htm

About.com article on US Federal Tax Rates - http://taxes.about.com/od/Federal-Income-Taxes/qt/Tax-Rates-For-The-2013-Tax-Year.htm

Wikipedia page for State Income Taxes - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/State_income_tax

About.com article on State Income Taxes - http://taxes.about.com/od/statetaxes/a/highest-state-income-tax-rates.htm

TaxAdmin.org's document showing all state tax rates - http://www.taxadmin.org/fta/rate/ind_inc.pdf

Comptroller Maryland Official Tax Information Sheet - http://taxes.marylandtaxes.com/Resource_Library/Tax_Publications/Tax_Facts/Withholding_Tax_Facts/Withholding_tax_facts_2013.pdf

Cost of Living Article Series

Hello everyone,

This morning I started to write an article about comparable costs of living between the US and the UK.
As I was writing I found that I ended up having so much to say, that I have since decided to break the article down into smaller entries, as not to bore you all at once!

The first one will be about income tax, and the second one about healthcare costs. I will continue the series to include property and vehicle taxes, sales tax and other costs of living.

The income tax one will be published later today, with the rest to follow later in the week. So, look out for those!

UPDATE:
My Battle of the Taxes article is now up, and can be read by clicking here.

Dan.

Our First I-797C Notice of Action Received!

Hello everyone,

Apologies for the lack of posts recently. Jon and I have both been at work full time, and really, there hasn't been much happening, besides something that arrived yesterday...

Last Monday (8 days ago) we finally filed our petition with the US immigration services. We would have had it filed at the end of the week before, except our lawyers for some reason told us they hadn't received everything (although they had...).

Anyway, despite the short delay of a couple of days, the petition was filed, and yesterday, a week to the day of filing, we received our first official document from the government!
The I-797C Notice of Action arrived to say our petition had been received!

Of course, at this point, it's just an acknowledgement, but all the same, it's exciting to know the ball is now in motion!

I have attached a picture below of the actual notice, blocking out Jon's address, Jon and I's dates of birth, and our receipt numbers and barcodes, for security reasons. Click to view larger image.

We can only hope that the rest of the process goes as quickly now!

Dan.

"What did he just say?"

One thing I have learnt in my many years going back and forth to the US, is that there are some very big differences in the way we speak!
I thought it would be fun to compile a list of the things I could think of from the top of my head.

To begin with, here's some vocabulary that is completely different:
Trousers - pants
Pants - underpants / underwear
Jumper - sweater
Chips - fries (fries to us are still fries though)
Crisps - chips
Courgette - zucchini
Aubergine - eggplant
Plug (electric) - outlet
Plug hole (bath) - drain
Tap - faucet
Bumbag - fanny pack
Aluminium - aluminum
University - college
Badge (one with a pin) - button
Petrol - gas (gasoline)
Lorry - truck / tractor trailer
Four by four - truck
People carrier - van
Camper van - RV
Manual transmission - stick shift
Holiday - vacation
Bank holiday or national holiday - holiday
Sweets - candy
Chocolate bar - candy bar
Candy floss - cotton candy
Mobile phone - cell phone
Rubbish - trash / garbage
Bin (as in rubbish) - trash can / garbage can
Rubbish man - garbage man
Rubbish truck - garbage truck
Postman - mail man /lady /person (in the UK postman doesn't always define wether they are a man or not, just like human)
Post - mail
Letters (plural only) - mail
Voucher - coupon
Soft drink / fizzy drink - soda or pop (regional)
Icing - frosting
Duvet - comforter (I'm still not even sure about this one!)
Autumn - fall
In line ("I'm waiting in line") - on line
Queue - line
Till - cash register (or just register)
Bank note - bill
Bill (in a restaurant) - check
School year / year group - grade
Woodwork / workshop / DT - shop
Maths - math
Fag (slang but commonly accepted) - cigarette (yes, I'm serious!)
Crash (mainly as in car crash) - wreck ("car wreck")
Christmas decoration (one that is like a figure, plastic, glass etc; for a Christmas Tree) - ornament
Lametta - tinsel
Tinsel - garland
Money box - money bank (or just bank)
Biscuit - cookie (our cookies are still cookies also)
Camcorder - video camera (we use video camera too)
Toilet (as in "I'm going to the toilet") - restroom or bathroom
A toilet cubicle in a public toilet - stall
Loo or bog - toilet/restroom etc
Hash key (on a phone) - pound sign/key (not to be confused with the British pound)?
Full stop - stop or period (no, for those wondering, a comma is still a comma, not a half stop!)
Exclamation mark - exclamation point
Speech mark(s) - quotation mark(s)
Trainers - sneakers or tennis shoes (I think actually sneakers and tennis shoes are slightly different styles in the US, but in the UK, they are all trainers)
Shopping trolley (or just trolley) - shopping cart (or just cart)
Loft - attic (although, we do say attic too. Loft to us is more in a regular house, with a hatch. An attic would be more like in a huge house that has a staircase leading up to it)
Lift - elevator
Pudding or afters - dessert (dessert is quite common in the UK too though. In the US, pudding is more specific, and more like mousse - like chocolate mousse for example)
Shopping centre or precinct - mall (in the US they also have strip malls, which to British people would sound funny, as we have no nearest equivalent. The best I can describe would be a shopping plaza, I think. A precinct would be a local police department in a city)
Nursery or reception - kindergarten
Primary school (infants and juniors) - elementary school (although elementary school ends a bit earlier, and US kids go off to middle school - see below)
Secondary school - middle school and high school (in a lot of the US they separate out the years and have three schools to attend)
Cheers - thanks
Alright? (as a greeting) - how are you? (definitely not asking if you've injured yourself!)
A&E - ER
Driving license - drivers license
Spelt - spelled
Dreamt - dreamed (I know Americans also use dreamt, but it seems less common)
Cinema - the same, but Americans also use 'movie theater' a lot, whereas we don't
Pictures (mainly old fashioned, but still in use. I guess it comes from picture house/moving pictures) - cinema
Elasticated - Americans don't have a separate word for something having having elastic, it's just simply elastic. For example, we would say elasticated trousers, Americans would say the pants have elastic.
Paracetamol - I think this is like Tylenol, but I could be wrong! Mainly for headaches and mild aches and pains
Tablet or pill - drugs or medicine
Medicine (to us usually fluid) - medicine
Washing - laundry (though we do say this too. Similarly, washing basket is laundry basket)
Washing up - the dishes ("let's do the washing up", "let's do the dishes")
Dressing gown - bathrobe
Settee - couch/sofa
Hay fever - allergies (but allergies are also allergies!)
Hoover - vacuum cleaner
Torch - flashlight
Diversion (when driving) - detour
Detached house - a single home, with no adjoining property
Semi-detached, mid-terrace or end of terrace house - town house
Interestingly the word house on its own in the US usually means a detached home, but in the UK is interchangeable with any type of home
Motorway - nearest equivalent for the type of road would be a freeway or an interstate. A highway in the US could be equivalent to a UK 'A' road.
Back garden (often just garden) - yard or backyard
Call in sick - call out sick
Phone, as in "I'll phone you" - "I'll call you"
Toilet roll - toilet paper (we use this too)
Single bed - twin bed (I never get this one - twin means two!)
Physiotherapy - physical therapy
The Hokey Cokey - the Hokey Pokey
Boot (car) - trunk
Bonnet (car) - hood

And this is something that we don't even have in British English:
1st year of high school and college are called freshman years
2nd year high school and college is sophomore
3rd (which is the last) year of both is called senior year
Accordingly, a student can be a freshman, sophomore or a senior.

Confused yet?

Words that are spelled almost the same, but not quite (although they all sound the sane either way):
Mum - mom
Collectable - collectible
Labour - labor
Harbour - harbor
Colour - color
Valour - valor
Theatre - theater (though this can vary)
Centre - center
Cheque - check (only as in monetary form. We would still use check if we were saying "check that off the list". In British English the idea is that there is a clear difference between a cheque and checking something)
Pyjamas - pajamas

And to be totally confusing, words that are spelled the same, but are spoken not just with a different accent, but actually sound like different words!
Parmesan - British English parmeSAN, American English parmeJARN (I can't exactly describe how it sounds in American English)
Fillet - British English filLET (said exactly as spelled, basically), American English filLAY (like from the French pronunciation)
Caramel - British English carAmel, American English carmel (the middle 'a' disappears)
Ferry - British English fErry, American English sounds like fairy. Ferry and fairy are indistinguishable in the US
Most words with a middle 't' - British English, for e.g. butter in American English would sound like budder to a British person.
There are many more with the 't' thing, too many to list!

There are undoubtedly hundreds more examples of language differences, and even as I was editing this to publish, I thought of more. I'll post more in another blog when I have big enough list again!

Dan.

The Wedding!

Hello everyone,

Apologies for the fact this is nearly a week late, but we have been very busy! Anyway, I wanted to let you all know that the wedding ceremony went perfectly, and we had a truly wonderful day.
The after party was lovely, filled with good food, and our family and friends.

I have a few pictures to share of the setup, but not of Jon and I - yet! I might have some of those in a week or two.

Following the party, we drove north and spent the weekend in New York with some dear friends of ours, and got back the early hours of Monday morning.

So, here's the pics! (Some things need explanation, which I have wrote after the pictures. Click images to see full size).

If you're wondering why the Christmas lights and Christmas Tree, they have some sentimental value to us. As I have said many times, we wanted things to be special and unique to us, and that is exactly what we did.
The tree actually had a lot of sentimental ornaments on it, that were special to Jon and his family.
The one of the wider shot of the room is a view looking from where Jon and I stood with our officiant, Sandy. The chairs were of course were where our guests were seated.
The picture of the table with Peter Pan and Stitch on it was I guess, for want of a better word, the "altar", and was basically right behind where the room shot was taken (where Jon and I stood).

If you have any questions or comments, feel free to post them below!

Just so you know, tomorrow we are off to Disneyland in California, and won't be back until late Tuesday night.

Have a good weekend everyone!

Dan.

Cakes and Flowers!

Hello everyone,

Last week I told you the exciting news about our rings, and today I'd like to share with you our cakes and flowers for the ceremony!

We have decided to chose two cakes that reflect both of our own unique personalities, and who we are as a couple.
As I have said many times before, we have never claimed to run by tradition. We are who we are, and we want what we want.
So, I have chosen a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cake, and Jon has chosen a Harry Potter one!

Here some pictures:

We are ordering them from Target (US department store/grocery chain).

When we were at Wegman's (another US grocery chain) last week we saw some really awesome roses. This is what we ordered:

Let us know what you think!

Only 4 days to go now until the big day!!

Dan.

The Day We Bought Four Rings!

Hello everyone,

Yesterday we went to Arundel Mills mall in Maryland to look for wedding rings.
Everyone we've spoke to seemed quite surprised that we left it so late - not least the ladies in Reeds where we ended up buying our rings!

We wandered around for a while, and were not really inspired by anything. We thought that maybe next weekend we could spend a day dedicated to looking for rings.
We walked into Reeds to just have a quick look, and was greeted by a very friendly assistant.

My two main concerns about buying rings had been that, one, if we bought them in Virginia - or at least tried to - we might have been met with some hostility. Virginia is technically "the south", it's a "red state", and they don't offer very many equal protections for LGBT people, especially not marriage equality.
Second, for those very reasons, we didn't want to be giving the state our tax money for expensive rings, when we weren't even getting married there.

Anyway, back to jewellers, and we browsed for a bit, and the very nice lady seemed really excited for us, if not really surprised we had left it so late to look for rings!
We wanted something a bit unconventional. I have never claimed to be conventional, and certainly wasn't going to start now!
They did have a good selection, including some rings that were labelled as wedding rings, but were definitely not your typical gold band.
We both liked two different styles, and couldn't decide.
The problem with the better one of the two styles we liked was that they needed to be custom ordered as they are made from tungsten (a dark metal).
We obviously wanted something for the ceremony though. So, we did something which some people might find strange, but like I said, I've never claimed to follow convention!
We bought the much cheaper titanium rings in our sizes there and then, and then also ordered the much more expensive tungsten rings, to be collected at a later date!

So, for now, we have a simple titanium ring each that fits, and in about 8 weeks we'll have our "real" rings, the tungsten ones!
So we'll actually have two wedding rings each in the end! At leas tI'll have a choice as to which one I want to wear on any given day!

I found some pictures of the rings on the internet for you to see.

The titanium ones we currently have are:

The tungsten ones we ordered are this neat Celtic dragon design:

Let me know what you think!

Dan.

Updates - Life in General

Hello everyone,

I know I haven't had much to say lately, but I guess while we wait for the process to get moving along, then there isn't much to report!
We have filled out the papers from the lawyers, and we sent in our fees already.
So, when I leave the US in September we can basically call the lawyer and say "ok, Dan is back home, and we'd like to file the petition now!" (You may recall before that I have said I can't be in the US while we go through this process.)

In the meantime, we've just been spending our summer preparing for our big day on the 23rd August.
We don't plan to have anything really big, but it'll be special and nice in its own way.
I haven't "officially" run all my plans by the rest of the family yet (!), so I can't reveal anything here, but we hope to talk to them, and our officiant for the day, within the next couple of days. Once we've spoke to them, then I can can let you all know what our big day is shaping up like; what we're doing, how we're doing it, etc.

A week ago today we went to get our marriage license at the Frederick County Courthouse over in Maryland.
It was a very simple process. We walked in, went to the clerk's desk, and told them our intention to get married. She asked a few questions (name, age, place of residence), and we had to take a very short oath swearing that we had no reason that we could not legally be wed (I.E. in an existing marriage still).
Then, we paid the fee (I think it was $75), she printed the certificate, and voila! We are now all set on that front!
On the big day, once married, our officiant will sign the certificate and file it with the court, and within 5 business days we should have our official marriage certificate!

Last weekend we went to BrickFair in Chantilly, VA. We've been before, a few years back. Always fun to see everyones crazy LEGO creations, and take a trip down memory lane looking at old sets.
Also last weekend my Canadian 'family' were down for a few days, too, and we hung out with them, which was really nice.

Tomorrow (Saturday) we are going to see the latest Disney Live! show. In all the madness of late I can't remember exactly which one it is, but I have a strong feeling it's a Disney Jr one, and has Sofia the First and Doc McStuffins in it.

Not sure if I mentioned it before, but the weekend we get married we are also going to New York City to stay with some friends. It wasn't intentionally planned as a "honeymoon" as we had made arrangements before we knew our wedding date, but I guess now it will be of sorts!

The week after that we'll be heading out to California for 5 days to visit Disneyland, and all our friends there, including one of our best and most trusted friends, Loren (I know he reads this, so I thought I'd give a shout out!).

After the DL trip I'll be heading home, then we can finally file all this paperwork that we have laying around! Then this process can really begin!

Anyway, I think that's all for now. I'll try to post more this weekend.

Dan.

We're Getting the Marriage Licence Today!

Hello everyone,

The title of this entry is fairly self-explanatory, I think!
We're driving up to the Frederick County Courthouse this afternoon to get our marriage license, so that we can actually get married on the 23rd!

Dan.

A Special Announcement

Hello everyone,

Today I can officially make an announcement that I have been wanting to make for a couple of weeks now!

I sent out the following email to our friends and family, and think it just as appropriate to copy that message here, as I think it explains what I have to say quite well.

*

Dear friends,

It is with great pleasure that I inform you that Jon and I will be getting married in Frederick, Maryland, USA on Friday 23rd August this year, at a small private family ceremony.

Once we are married, we are going to (finally!) begin immigration proceedings so that I can move to the US permanently, so we can be together.
We anticipate that this will take anywhere up to a year. We intend to move to near Jon's family in Frederick, Maryland.

This first ceremony is going to be a basic one, because we need to get the ball rolling for immigration, but also because when we have more time and money we would actually like to have a Disney Fairytale Wedding at the Disneyland Resort in California.
We really want to have the time and resources to plan this properly, and unfortunately we can't do that right now.
Of course we'd already be married, but would instead have a commitment ceremony, which would reflect our ongoing pursuit of happiness and being together.
At that point, our extended family and friends would be welcome to join us in celebrating our marriage properly.

We appreciate all of your friendships, kindness and ongoing support.

If anyone would like to send gifts, we have actually chosen a small selection of charities which we feel support worthwhile causes, which you can donate to on our behalf. We have everything we could possibly need already, so your support of an organisation that funds a worthwhile cause means more to us.
The charities we have chosen are included at the end of this email.

Thank you all,

Best wishes, and kind regards,

Dan and Jon.


Our chosen charities:

For our UK/EU friends and family, you might want to consider these...

The British Hedgehog Preservation Society http://www.britishhedgehogs.org.uk/index.php (click the donate online button)
The Fox Project http://www.foxproject.org.uk/ (the right-hand panel has donation information)
Adopt an animal on our behalf from The British Wildlife Centre http://www.britishwildlifecentre.co.uk/planyourvisit/animaladoption.html (click for details of how to adopt)
Stonewall UK https://www.stonewall.org.uk/what_you_can_do/donate_to_stonewall/default.asp (lots of options for donating)

For our friends in the United States and Canada, you can donate to these...

The DOMA Project http://www.domaproject.org/donate
Animal Welfare Institute http://awionline.org/ (donate is on blue, on the left side)
Siamese Cat Rescue Center http://va.siameserescue.org/ (how to donate on the left)
The Trevor Project http://www.thetrevorproject.org/ (donate in the top right corner)
GLAAD http://www.glaad.org/ (donate in the top right corner)

Step One - Hiring a Lawyer

Hello everyone,

After several weeks of waiting to hear from the lawyer at Masliah and Soloway, we finally had our consultation last night!

As you may recall, their company was the ones who helped set up the DOMA Project, which was designed by the firm's lawyers to challenge DOMA.

After DOMA was overturned, they began offering initial consultations for free.

We applied for this, but only last night did we finally get ours.

Anyway, we spent an hour or so talking via Skype to Lavi Soloway, having a detailed discussion about what happened next, what we should do and the immigration process.

Overall it was very useful. He was able to clarify for us a few questions we had, and we have decided to go ahead and hire them as our representatives through this process.

Their fees seem quite reasonable, and are a flat fee rather than ongoing costs that they bill us for. It allows you to know exactly where you stand.

Lavi informed us that they are very flexible with payments, and will always try to figure out what is best for the clients.

So, to begin with the fee for the filing of the first round of paperwork will cost $1500, which we are paying as three $500 instalments.

For this fee, they sent us a list of everything we need to gather.

We send it all to them, and then they will file the forms on our behalf.

We also have to pay them the fees as required for the I-130 petition. These are currently set at $420.

This is the list and instructions sent to us:

For the U.S. Citizen Spouse - Petitioner:

*Marriage Certificate
*Birth Certificate
*Biographical Page of U.S. Passport

*U.S. Naturalization Certificate (if applicable)

*Document Evidencing Termination of Prior Marriage (if applicable)

*One Passport-style Photograph (requirements: <http://www.travel.state.gov/visa/visaphotoreq/visaphotoreq_5334.html> )

For the Foreign National Spouse - Beneficiary:

*Birth Certificate (with certified translation if document is not in English)
*Passport(s) (a copy of each page of each passport, including cover)

*Document Evidencing Termination of Prior Marriage (if applicable)
One Passport-style Photograph (requirements for this linked above)

All documents not in English must be accompanied by certified translations. Upon request, we can have any documents translated on your behalf for a small fee. Each translation must include a statement signed by the translator that states that the:

*Translation is accurate, and,
*Translator is competent to translate from that language into English.

Of course, only a select few things on that list apply to us, but it is worth noting here for people reading this that it does affect.

So, when I am with Jon this week, we will fill out the forms that were attached to the email, get our photos taken, and send both with the fees and copies of our birth certificates to them.

Once we are married we will forward them our marriage certificate.

The lawyers will then send everything needed to the USCIS, and step one will be completed!

Once we have the forms in hand, and we are filling them out, I will document more accurately what you have to do exactly, as so that others can benefit from our experience.

I had mentioned that there was a second fee for the lawyers.

This is the only only other fee we pay them, besides and US government fees which they pay on our behalf when we send them the money.

It just takes away the stress of us doing it, and potentially getting it wrong. They ask, we provide, and we know it'll get done properly!

Anyway, the second fee I believe was $2500.

This will be for all assistance and forms etc after the I-130 has been sent, basically until the end of the process.

So, to recap, here's what we've had to do so far/about to do if not already:

*Hire a good immigration lawyer (Masliah and Soloway are immigration experts, and founders of the DOMA Project).

*Order any copies of birth certificates we don't hold.

*Send copies of these, plus passport photos, all our passport information, and travel information about my visits to the US.

*Provide personal biographical information to the lawyer, such as home addresses, work, Jon's income etc.

*File the lawyer fee and USCIS fee with the lawyers.

*Get married so that the lawyers can file the I-130 petition with the USCIS.

You may have noticed that "get married" was on the list. You may also recall that we haven't done this yet, as I was looking into venues etc.

Well, I am going to update about that probably tomorrow, so stay tuned!

Overall so far hasn't been too painful. Just a lot of waiting. And there'll be a lot more of that over the next year!

I'm actually typing this on my iPhone right now, but when I'm back at my desk I am going to make another update about getting married, what we have done to get that started, and I also will attach the forms we have had to fill out so far, so that you can all see the process exactly as it is (blank copies of course, which then you can print and use as a practice model if you want).

Dan.

Birth Certificate Arrived!

Hello everyone,

As you can tell from the title of this entry, my full UK birth certificate that I ordered 3 weeks ago from the General Register Office (GRO) finally came today!
I am documenting this here so that I have a record of how long this entire process is taking!
Also, others might be wondering where theirs is, or how long it will take, so now we know!
Standard service - expect it to be 3 weeks!

Dan.

Food for Thought - Lawyers, Birth Certificates and Working

Hello everyone,

Just some food for thought this afternoon.

First off, I am still waiting for my full UK birth certificate to arrive. Apparently it is being sent out today! I'll be glad to finally have it in my hands!

Second, I want to mention our experience with the lawyers so far.
As you may recall, Jon and I decided to take up the free offer from Masliah-Soloway. Unfortunately they haven't really proven themselves to be very helpful or efficient so far.
I assume their offer was not only to help same sex bi-national couples, but of course to also drum up business. I mean, a company offers a free consultation, and if you're impressed, you'd hire them, right?
Well, according to their Facebook page so far they have helped over 200 couples on this "offer" and filed over 100 immigration petitions.
I emailed them within the hour they posted about their offer way back after DOMA was struck down.
All we have had so far is some rather vague emails asking if we can Skype during the evenings. And that was well over a week ago.
If anyone has had a better experience with them, please feel free to share it with me, but thus far we are probably going to ditch them and hire a more reliable lawyer.
A shame since Masliah-Soloway are meant to be experts in same sex immigration. Oh well, c'est la vie.

The last thing I wanted to mention was something just bugged me in a conversation I saw online, and actually made me think about my own situation.
When I come to the US I'll probably lose a lot of the benefits that I get now in my adult working life.

Workers in the UK are entitled by law to 5.6 weeks paid annual leave per year (equivalent to 28 days full time; pro-rata for part time). Armed forces get 38 days. Our minimum wage for working adults is £6.19, rising to £6.31 on 1st October this year (that's just under US $10).

As a comparison, the US Federal minimum wage is currently $7.25 ($2 less than the UK), and companies are NOT required to pay you for time off, according to the Fair Labor Standards Act (FLSA).
That's not to say whoever I end up working for won't be more generous, and I know some companies are fairly decent, but it's the fact that there is nothing that binds them in law to give me those benefits, whereas here in the UK it's my right.

Like I said, some food for thought for you today.

Dan.

Equal Marriage becomes law in England and Wales

Hello everyone,

Today, the final formality in the process of making the Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Bill law happened.
The final stage, known as Royal Assent, was announced by the Speaker in the House of Commons this afternoon.

The new law is quite complicated, and there are lots of amendments and clauses that went into it, before it was finally passed.
Later this week I hope to pick it apart more thoroughly and make a post on here about what it covers, and what it doesn't.

There is one point I want to make clear. The Queen is for the most part a figurehead, and plays no part in politics and the government's policies. The Queen nearly always keeps her opinions to herself, and would never compromise herself or her government by making any potential controversial statements (she leaves that to her husband... *wink wink* for any Brits reading this!).
My point is that she did not give her "approval" or have any part in the debate, despite what the US mass media are claiming. They are simply sensationalist headlines.
If she refused to sign anything into law (and I'm not even sure that technically she even does that these days) I am almost certain that the Conservatives would waste no time in holding a referendum and getting rid of the monarchy altogether!

A move in the right direction for sure, but remember, even though this was debated in the Parliament of the United Kingdom, this bill only covers England and Wales. Scotland are likely to pass their own law, and Northern Ireland, well, who knows...

Dan.

I'm still here!

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to make a quick post to say that I am still going to update this blog, it's just that the last week I have been busy with work.
And, in all fairness, I haven't had anything too riveting to talk about!

Anyway, I hope to make some posts this weekend, so watch out for those.

Enjoy the sun, and stay cool!

Dan.

Freedom, and an American London

Hello everyone,

Despite the fact I will be moving to the US to be with Jon, and despite my love for many American things (as I've mentioned several times on this blog), I will never forget my routes and ties with Britain.
Being British is as much a part of me as being American will be.
Having said that, anyone that knows me knows that I am all for dismantling the man made borders of our world; allowing freedom of movement to enable people to live the lives they want to, with the people they want to.
It's not just about love, but about the general principle of freedom.

Sadly though, my ideal of a free and utopian world are far from being realised - but I can dream, right?
Although, thankfully the European Union does embrace this ideal to some extent, and with the freedom of movement granted to all European Citizens, we now have a 27-country zone where we can work, play and live freely. It's a step towards my ideal for sure!

Anyway, seeing as soon I will not only be British and European, but American, thus bringing me one step closer to this "world wide freedom", I thought I would share some pictures with you from my adventures in London with Jon since we have known each other.
In particular, I wanted to point out some very American influences that can be found in London, to show that even with borders and immigration regulations, interests, hobbies, tastes and latest crazes are without borders, and represent the diverse world in which we live.
Brits love American things, and Americans love British things.

So, here's a tour of some of London's most famous landmarks, along with some American influences along the way. There might even be some pictures of Jon and I thrown in, too!

In case you didn't read it already, I made a similar post about the US the other day, which includes lots of photos from my adventures across the US with some very British influences.

Let's start with... M&Ms! An American brand, but one the Brits love. Just don't ask for the peanut butter ones!
Leicester Square in the West End has a huge M&Ms Store, and it is one of my favourite places to visit when ever I'm in the city.
They really made a decent effort with the store. It incorporates some very British icons with those famous American chocolate shells!


Of course, Disney is massive in Europe, as it is world over, and no trip to London would be complete without visiting its numerous Disney Stores. Here's Jon and I at the Covent Garden one, which again (like M&Ms) has some very British influences.
  Peter Pan is Jon's favourite character, and London has many Peter Pan related gems. For those who don't know, James Barrie was Scottish, but wrote Peter Pan from his home in Kensington, just across from the famous Kensington Gardens. There is now a plaque on his former house, and a very famous statue of Peter Pan in Kensington Gardens which was a gift from Barrie himself.

 
Peter Pan has been adapted for stage and screen many times, but maybe one of its most famous incarnations is Walt Disney's Peter Pan - of course American.

Barrie was a supporter of Great Ormond Street Children's Hospital, and left the rights to his works with the hospital, earning them a profit for their good work, forever more. There is a statue of Peter Pan at the hospital, too.
  The hippie movement was just as big in London as it was in San Francisco back in the day. Anyone who knows me well, knows that I am somewhat a hippie at heart. Peace and love, all.
 
Kensington Palace was the home of Diana, Princess of Wales, who was much loved world over - in particular by Americans. The statue in front of Kensington Palace is of King William III, who was also said to have provided the stylistic inspiration for Barrie's villain, Captain Hook. I'll let you decide for yourself...
  Here's Jon and I being goofy at the Westminister London Underground station!

 
Coca-Cola is another massive American brand that has strong British ties. Anyone who is a Brit reading this will know exactly what I mean when I saw "it's not Christmas until you've seen the advert!"... If a company has the power to influence a different nations view of Christmas, that alone makes is free of the confines of the artificial borders we create.
  For the last American influence I'm going to post, it's a picture of a plaque that marks the London home of Benjamin Franklin - one of the United States' founding fathers, having helped draft the Declaration of Independence. His father was British.
  I'll finish up this blog with some pictures of various London landmarks and famous sights, that do not necessarily have an American story to them.

The Tower of London.
  City Hall.
  Various Royal Guards.
  Pall Mall - leading up to Buckingham Palace.
  Jon and I at the Victoria Memorial in front of the palace.

 
 Buckingham Palace and the memorial.
  Tower Bridge (not to be confused with London Bridge! A common mistake by tourists!)
  The London Eye.
  St. Paul's Cathedral.
  Shakespeare's Globe Theatre.
  Part of the Animals in War Memorial.
  The Palace of Westminster, AKA the Houses of Parliament.
  Trafalgar Square.
  Jelly Babies!
  And finally... The Union Flag, more commonly known as the Union Jack!
 
Dan.